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Writer's picturePaul Noiles

Why Asking 'What Happened to You?' Instead of 'What is Wrong with You?' Matters in Mental Health

Here are my heartfelt reflections as I leave Cancun Today: I will start with this powerful HEALING quote from Iyaanla VANZANT: Until we heal the wounds of our past, we will continue to bleed. These wounds will bleed and stain our lives—through alcohol, drugs, sex, overworking, food, shopping, unhealthy relationships, codependency, depression, and countless other ways. The most crucial healing question isn’t “What’s wrong with you?” but “What happened to you?” Especially in those critical first seven years of your life, where so much of who we are--- begins to take shape. Research confirms this again and again. We all need healing, every one of us. If we don’t take steps to heal our past, we will stay stuck, get ill, especially autoimmune ones, and have difficulty in most of our relationships, blaming others and being unable to live our best lives. Healing takes courage, but it thrives the most in human safe connection. If this message speaks to you, know that you’re not alone —reach out - Let’s take the first step together.






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PayingAttention
4 days ago

What a great shift in perspective. Asking, "What happened to me?" makes it feel possible to peel away all the stories that are keeping us stuck and move beyond the impulse to "fix"what is "wrong" with ourselves.

Curtir
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